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Thread: The diary of hoopymo

  1. #1
    woooooooo Hoopymo's Avatar
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    Default The diary of hoopymo

    The morn of Friday, the 22nd day of May, 2009.

    Dearest Diary,

    Working today, as always. The monotonous cycle that is my life continues to revolve without event. The weather is as bleak as my mood and I fear that if I must proceed down this dreary path, I may do something drastic.

    I left my home this morning, as I always do. However, things were not as they appeared. Today was no ordinary day, as I had forgotten to take my wallet – and thus, my money and bus pass to work with me. Woe ensued upon this cruel realisation. Fortunately, I was provided with free passage to work, in the form of my elder sibling’s Honda civic. My return journey shan’t be as fortuitous; I will have to pay full price for transit on the city’s underground system. Damnation.

    Hunger has sunk its malevolent claws into the pit of my gut – I must seek nourishment… To the kitchen I venture.

  2. #2
    Outside The Box Cash67's Avatar
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    Default Re: The diary of hoopymo

    That's deep man, yer like Anne Frank - The Govanhill Years

  3. #3
    McAlpine's Fusilier Dusty Mac's Avatar
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    Default Re: The diary of hoopymo

    Man up ffs!
    http://www.board67.com/forum/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=65&dateline=124621052  3

  4. #4
    Semi-Benevolent Dictator Euskadi's Avatar
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    I wasnt born, so much as I fell out

    Default Re: The diary of hoopymo


  5. #5
    woooooooo Hoopymo's Avatar
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    Default Re: The diary of hoopymo

    The early afternoon of Friday, the 22nd day of May, 2009.

    Dearest Diary,

    Work is complete for yet another day in what seems like an endless cycle. My mind and body weary from the day’s toil. Is life destined to continue in such a fashion, or am I to broaden my proverbial horizons and progress down some as-of-yet unknown path which will lead me away from this mundaneness?

    My venture to the kitchen was an unfortunate one to say the least. My attention driven from the task at hand towards my distracting and ever-growing hunger, I arose from my desk and made my way to the vending machines in search of sustenance. Having forgotten about my earlier realisation that I was without money, I was sorely disappointed to re-learn that I was penniless.

    Defeated, I returned to my office. As I entered the fluorescent-lit nightmare that is my dwelling between the hours of 8am and 4pm each week day, my gaze happened upon the tea fund. Could I? Should I? What if I get caught? My unrelenting hunger cared not for my predicament, nor the moral quandary I was experiencing. With nobody around I did the unthinkable – I lifted a shining pound coin from the fund and made my way hastily to the canteen to purchase both a Kit Kat and a packet of Salt and Vinegar-flavoured McCoy’s potato crisps. Victuals at last! The hunger in my stomach receded and was replaced with churnings of a different kind. The guilt was too much. I could not pilfer from my colleagues who had entrusted me with access to the tea fund and shown me their respect. Upon returning to the office, I explained to my immediate superior that I was without money, and that I had borrowed the pound, and I was to replace it as soon as I had sufficient funds on my person. I, and she, were appeased and I continued with my work.

  6. #6
    Bhoy's Hero Claire's Avatar
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    Default Re: The diary of hoopymo

    How very poetic

  7. #7
    woooooooo Hoopymo's Avatar
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    Default Re: The diary of hoopymo

    The night of Monday, the 24th day of May, 2009.

    'Twas late last night or more accurately early this morning.

    I could not get a wink of sleep, the day's exertions had failed to suitably tire me. The clock ticked away, the witching hour came and left without event.

    I lay awake, lamenting the day, the weary path I trudge through life, contemplating the insignificance of the stars...

    When the clock struck three. I was startled by an alarming sound. Although it seemed distant, it felt close enough to chill me to the bone. Reminiscent of both a mournful wail and a blood-curdling howl, I was rendered even further awake by the fear and energy running through my veins.

    Sat up, alert in my bed, awaiting the fate that was to befall me at the bloodied claws of the hellish beast that lurked outside, I felt my stomach turn, and it turns out the noise was just my tummy.

  8. #8
    like fuck Bhoys Dont Cry's Avatar
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    Default Re: The diary of hoopymo

    Wow, deep.

  9. #9
    Celtic Legend Mr Discharge's Avatar
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    Default Re: The diary of hoopymo

    Such good build up to a fantastic and very unexpected ending

  10. #10

    Default Re: The diary of hoopymo

    Very good, Edgar Allan Mo.

  11. #11

    Default Re: The diary of hoopymo

    OH ffs JUST KILL YOURSELF ALREADY JAMIE

    JESUS


    HOW WHINEY CAN YOU GET


    also, Messi1888, that's was a good one

  12. #12
    Squirrel!!! angiebowie's Avatar
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    Default Re: The diary of hoopymo

    does anyone ever get their kit off??


    Cheers Cashy!!!

  13. #13
    I live for Glasgow Celtic clagan's Avatar
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    Default Re: The diary of hoopymo

    Quote Originally Posted by ninjatim View Post
    does anyone ever get their kit off??
    yeah i do, wanna see?

  14. #14
    Squirrel!!! angiebowie's Avatar
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    Default Re: The diary of hoopymo

    Quote Originally Posted by clagan View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by ninjatim View Post
    does anyone ever get their kit off??
    yeah i do, wanna see?
    exhibitionist are we?

  15. #15
    I live for Glasgow Celtic clagan's Avatar
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    Default Re: The diary of hoopymo

    yep, wanna see?

  16. #16

    Default Re: The diary of hoopymo

    only if you're a chick

  17. #17
    woooooooo Hoopymo's Avatar
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    Default Re: The diary of hoopymo

    The early afternoon of Tuesday, the 27th day of May, 2009.

    Dearest diary,

    The rain has subsided and the clouds – along with my mood – have lifted. My spirits have been brightened by the emergence of the sun. Despite having resigned myself to the fact that I am destined to be stuck in this blasted office for the remainder of my day, my mind’s eye is looking forward to the oncoming weekend.

    A colleague, having noticed a forlorn look upon my face, quipped; “Cheer up, the weekend’s coming!” I replied “The weekend is always coming.” Despite the poignancy of my remark, I fear it was not well-received.

    Luncheon. A time to rest and re-fuel. I, as I am oft-found to be doing, perambulated across the road to the supermarket to purchase my afternoon victuals. Safe in the knowledge that the pocket of my trousers contained my wallet, along with the meagre funds that remained from purchases made earlier in the week.

    As I arrived at the store, I approached the auto-telling machines that operate by the entrance. Much to my shock and disappointment, all four were out of order as they were to be replaced. A fear swept over me. I hadn’t withdrawn monies in a number of days and had been far from stringent with my budget. I surveyed the contents of my wallet – a mere six pounds and a negligible number of pennies. My plans to reimburse the tea fund and satisfy my appetite with a hearty luncheon seemed to have befallen the same fate as the best-laid plans of mice and men alike. I had not enough to do both and thus had to prioritise. The tea fund - to the best of my recollection - remained with over twenty pounds in it; however, my hunger would not be subdued by anything that only one pound and pocket-change could provide. I had but only one option.

    I purchased a packet of processed chicken – hardly a feast fit for a king, but with appropriate seasoning and accompaniment, could provide an appetizing repast. With the chicken, I purchased four rolls and a tin of Cream of Tomato soup. When preparing my meal, I ground sea salt and pepper onto my chicken, the perfect seasoning to garnish my poultry. The rolls and the soup filled my stomach and I was pleased with myself. I filled the remainder of my break with some cerebral exercise in the form of a challenging “Sudoku” puzzle in my newspaper.

    Back to work. Return to tedium.

  18. #18
    Squirrel!!! angiebowie's Avatar
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    Default Re: The diary of hoopymo

    jaysus, you are just living on the edge mate

  19. #19
    Celtic Legend metrobhoy2's Avatar
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    Default Re: The diary of hoopymo

    Bloody auto tellers

    Banking time is the way forward.

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